Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz - Gizmodo Comments

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

spaceflight101 — Fri, 03 Nov 2006 19:06:31 EST

Until artificial gravity is developed, it is necessary to find out if conception can occur in microgravity, because until FTL is developed, serious spaceflight will be multigenerational. Something many of you have missed is Newton's laws of motion, and the fact that in microgravity there are no "beds" to work against. It's not as easy as you think it is.
A lot of the gadgets mentioned won't work in space for various reasons. Take a GPS, for instance. They require a clear view of the satellites, and the signals won't enter the metal shell of the ISS. Besides, there isn't a consumer GPS that will work at 17,500 mph.
The ISS has one, just use it to see where you are. Your cell phone or BlackBerry won't work either. Anything that relies upon receiving radio signals won't work.
iPods, or any battery-powered device with self-contained media will be just fine. Take your laptop with music and video files, and enjoy.
But in all reality, please use "common courtesy", and everything will be just fine. The "long hair" rule also applies to those of you who sport mullets, too.

spaceflight101

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

svendawg777 — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 14:37:39 EDT

#10 doesn't really count... I had to add one of the most crucial rules.

10. There is one thing that everyone in space wants to do and that is a flip. And why not? For all you rollercoaster lovers out there, space is the amusement park for the ultimate rollercoaster corkscrew flip. In space, flipping can be hella fun, but can also backfire into a nightmare if done without utmost precision. With zero gravity acting as a super-conductor and you as a boomerang, a careless flip has the potential to turn into a violent-spinning-cycle-of-death. In fact, flips have been known to take out an entire spacecraft... all because one astronaut thinks he has the biggest balls and feels a need to show them off in the act of the ultimate flip... but little does he know it's the flip-o-death!

svendawg777

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

boilerbots — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 22:12:10 EDT

Rule #5 is a legitimate reason to enforce the "swallow" rule for everyones safety (and enjoyment).

boilerbots

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

infmom — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 21:17:20 EDT

Membership in the Geostationary Orbit Club will certainly do wonders for ending the argument about who gets to be on top...

infmom

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Jeepin — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 19:09:29 EDT

Philisophical Question:
If sex occurs in space, and there are no bedsprings or headboard does the "squeak, bang, squeak, bang" noise still occur?

Jeepin

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Synthfilker — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 18:25:31 EDT

Oops... that should read "Astronauts Lee and Davis got married during training..."

Synthfilker

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Synthfilker — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 18:23:41 EDT

Well, re: Rule 5, There has at least been a legitimate opportunity for it. See: http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/shuttle/shuttlemissions/...

Astronauts Lee and Davis during training... without the knowledge of NASA. When it was made public, they were placed on opposite work shifts for the duration of the mission.

Oddly enough, the mission was extended for an extra day... and the middeck cameras were out for a short period on that day.

To quote from the "Mission Highlights" on the above NASA site:

"Materials science investigations covered such fields as biotechnology, electronic materials, fluid dynamics and transport phenomena, glasses and ceramics, metals and alloys, and acceleration measurements. Life sciences included experiments on human health, cell separation and biology, developmental biology, animal and human physiology and behavior, space radiation, and biological rhythms. Test subjects included the crew, Japanese koi fish (carp), cultured animal and plant cells, chicken embryos, fruit flies, fungi and plant seeds, and frogs and frog eggs."

Things that make you go "Hmmmmmm..."....

Synthfilker

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Calaverius — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 17:51:07 EDT

Whoa, that girl is pretty cute...for space.

Calaverius

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Brad — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 17:42:52 EDT

The day I'm floating along and someone's jizz floats by, is the day there's the first Space-Stabbing-in-the-eye, immediatly followed by the first space-suplergluing-your-cock-closed.

Space is full of firsts!

Brad

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

jmchez — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 17:12:13 EDT

Haven't a bunch of people spent a month or more up there? That means that they all masturbated. Thus, Rule No. 5.

jmchez

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Atrocious — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:54:02 EDT

11. Cans of shaving cheese are NOT for use as "emergency thrusters".

12. Asking "Did you put the cat out?" not funny after the third time.

13. Few DVD players support orbital region code 11.

Atrocious

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

aec007 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:38:38 EDT

On the other hand, farting in space, aside from the stink, could make one heck of a game for "Self Propeled Olympics"...

All you would need is some sort of a funnel (to work as a rocket nozzle) and a spark generator (a barbeque 9V igniter would do).

... And a can of beans.

Who knows... may be that's why they call him "FLASH" Gordon.

aec007

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

genericuser — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:36:52 EDT

Who is Dan Quayle?

genericuser

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

aec007 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:27:33 EDT

For the record...
Russians had sex in space... or something like it. According to my knowledge women cannot get pregnant in space (or zero G at least) due to the fact that a fertilized embrio cannot latch to the walls of the uterus due to the lack of gravity. So after a few hours, the lack of nutrients will result in a dead embrio.

Now... whether they tested this by artificial insemination or doing the Wild Polka... I do not know. I guess we can all agree one method is a hell of a lot easier and a lot more fun than the other.

Hey Would you try it in the name of Science? Heck, I would be the first in line!

If space weightlessness is the natural contraceptive and Bigelow Aerospace builds that hotel... there gonna be a lot of whooping going on up there!

http://www.thespacereview.com/article/660/1

Scotty, Beam me up!

aec007

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

katedugas — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:17:16 EDT

we've got to help akina so she can go to outerspace if she wants to

katedugas

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

uhm...Bob — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:12:44 EDT

I wonder if any GPS units will work in space. Is there a website to download space map packs?

uhm...Bob

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

aestheticity — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 15:52:04 EDT

I also want to know who got it on in space. I didn't think anyone to date had had the time, energy or will? Best, I'd have thought, to avoid undue exertion as much as possible... not many opportunities to clean up.

aestheticity

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

cudthecrud — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 15:30:37 EDT

I think NASA still says it never asked anyone to have space sex and is in the "no comment" area when asked if anyone has orbited uglies.

cudthecrud

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

timerider42 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 15:30:20 EDT

Rule #8: No smoking. It stinks up everyone's air and can blow up the oxygen. If you must smoke, take it outside so it's confined to your space suit. Or the vaccuum of space where the air will be sucked from your lungs and you'll explode.

timerider42

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

FatTony707 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 15:27:47 EDT

Man what a hottie. How come everyones jaw drops for the asian TV models but no jaw dropping action for our hot space traveler. Look at that smile and that hair. Man I want to break #5 every time I see that beauty........

FatTony707

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

gman — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 15:08:15 EDT

250 miles high club :-)

gman

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

bumpi — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:59:53 EDT

We must be sending up a lot of gay people to warrant rule nr.5 :)

bumpi

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Justapspfan — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:55:42 EDT

Rule #8 No spraying Lysol All Purpose cleaner in the ship.

Rule #9 No picking your figging nose in space, its digusting and where are you going to flick em.

Justapspfan

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Grover — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:55:08 EDT

@rasaustin and gotsmart: Really... I want to know how many astronauts are in the 100-mile high club.

Grover

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Thunderous_Thor — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:34:54 EDT

Long hair? Tie that shit down! And if you MUST have sex, please clean all your floating sperm to avoid unwanted pregnancy.

Thunderous_Thor

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

homerjay — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:34:52 EDT

Genericuser = Dan Quayle.

homerjay

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

homerjay — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:33:08 EDT

AMEN Strider. Last time I was in space I opened a big bag of chips. What a mess.....

homerjay

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

gotsmart — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:30:18 EDT

Just how many astromanauts have been having space sex that it warranted its own rule?

gotsmart

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

genericuser — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:29:41 EDT

I always wanted to eat floating potatoe chips.

genericuser

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

rustybrown — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:15:25 EDT

don't eat the yellow spheres.

rustybrown

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

GFX-187 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:11:51 EDT

holding in your farts may lead to spontaneous combustion, i saw it in a documentry called southpark. :)

GFX-187

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

strider_mt2k — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:03:31 EDT

-and don't break open the ant farm.

strider_mt2k

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

TommySez — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:59:12 EDT

No farting? C'mon. You'll hurt yourself doing that.

TommySez

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

thetonyp — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:53:59 EDT

re: rasaustin

Whoever went up with the girl in the picture...

thetonyp

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

dambo29 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:49:00 EDT

wouldn't you want to try out rule #5? so... don't complain about the clean up.

dambo29

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

dambo29 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:47:46 EDT

What 3 gadgets would you take to space?
- iPod..... what can be better than to have Pink Floyd in space?
- A badass digital camera with tons of storage (10 mega pixels at least) - think how jelous your friends will be once they see your "little vacation" pix.
- Video camera to record all the stupid things you could/would do in zero G.

I think that would have to be my list...

dambo29

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

lafauce — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:47:46 EDT

More importantly... who is the space Cutie!!!!

lafauce

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

lafauce — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:45:57 EDT

More importantly... who is the Space Cutie!

lafauce

Space Etiquette: Top Ten Tips From Astronauts, Space Docs and the Giz

Old No.7 — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 13:42:10 EDT

re: Rule #5... Who's been doin' the big nasty in orbit that they had to make up this rule?

Old No.7