Gizmodo: Weight loss

Blocked Enzyme Curbs Appetite, Promotes Weight Loss, Probably Causes Cancer or Something

Adam Frucci — Tue, 06 May 2008 18:00:00 EDT

Good news, America! Your faithful scientific elite have isolated a brain enzyme that, when blocked, decreases appetite, promotes weight loss and improves the body's ability to handle blood sugar levels. You'll be fat and diabetic no longer!

There'll be no need to exercise when you'll have easy access to a drug that makes trans-fat-laden fast food less appealing while it burns away the vast reserves of fat your body has been storing away all these years in preparation for a wilderness expedition you'll never take. Of course, the blocked enzyme, CaMKK2, has only been tested in mice, but I mean mice are like one step away from humans, right?

Screw the testing, just bring us the drugs and we'll take the risk. Just don't make us keep exercising or using willpower to stay healthy. We can't take it anymore. [Physorg]

Body Energizer Vibrating Exercise Machine Shrinks Something, But Not Your Butt

Charlie White — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 11:40:48 EDT

The Body Energizer Vibrating Exercise Machine claims to improve your muscle strength and bone density, using some magic high-frequency vibration. Doesn't this remind you of those worthless butt-shaking machines that were so popular back in the '60s? This one's makers also boast about how it could actually speed weight loss. They even drop the possibility of a few Olympic athletes using it. Take the jump to read the entertaining and incredible exultation to get you to buy this thing. And hey, it's on sale!

Simply hold on to the grippy bars, and stand or squat on the nonslip platform (or try one of the many alternate positions illustrated). In just two to four minutes, three to five times a week, you'll notice a remarkable difference within a month. Similar machines cost as much as $2,500—but why pay more?

Hmm. Also works as a massage machine? Different positions? Sounds like something entirely different. The good news? It regularly cost $400 and now it's just $229.95. Caveat emptor. [Hollywood Gadgets, via Sci Fi Tech]

Tanita BC-545 Scale: Learn More About That Flab Than You Really Want to Know

Charlie White — Fri, 02 Mar 2007 13:00:00 EST

Tanita scales are so cool. But this Tanita Innerscan BC-545 measures a whole lot more than your weight, so much so that the company calls it a Segmental Body Composition Monitor. It can give you readings of how much fat is in each arm, each leg, and of course, that potentially ample repository of adipose tissue (that's blubber in doctor talk), the trunk area.

Stand on the four sensor plates and pull up on two retractable electronics, and the device sends a weak electric current through your body to see what you're really made of. It keeps track of your measurements and can display your progress in days, weeks, or months over a three-year period. One thing that will be much lighter right away is your wallet—the BC-545 costs $390. – Charlie White

The Amazing InnerScan Segmental Body Composition Monitor [Gizmag]

Kids Get 40% More Calorie Burning Playing Wii Than 360, PS3

Jason Chen — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 16:00:36 EST

As a follow up to our post before about a lady complaining that her kids were playing sports on the Wii instead of out engaging in the real thing, here's a study from a Liverpool university that says kids burn 40% more calories from playing Wii than other consoles.

Among the findings, energy expenditures were at 156% of resting when playing Wii as opposed to 60% with regular controllers, and a total potential of 1,830 calories burned a week. Multiplied that out to a year, kids can "shift" 27lb in a year. Does shift mean lose? Because that sounds pretty high to us. – Jason Chen

Wii - Kids Burn 40% More Calories Says Research [Spong]

Image by Jessica New

Enviga: Calorie-Burning Tea to Melt Off That Extra Flab?

Charlie White — Thu, 12 Oct 2006 10:47:36 EDT

Coca-Cola and Nestl will roll out Enviga in test markets in the Northeast US next month. The carbonated green tea-based beverage is supposed to be able to actually burn calories. Its blend of green tea extracts is said to boost metabolism, burning 50 to 100 calories per 12-oz serving. That'll cost you, though, about $1.29 a can. The company plans a national rollout in early 2007.

So what do you think, readers? Is this bullshit, or is it possible to drink your way to runway-model thinness? – Charlie White

Coke, Nestle Unveil Calorie-Burning Beverage [Advertising Age]

New Enviga Proven to Burn Calories [BevNet] (beware, industry cheerleader)

One Click Butter Cutter for Calorie Counters, Obsessives, Lazy Bums

Charlie White — Tue, 10 Oct 2006 15:00:00 EDT

Too tired or lazy to cut your butter in the morning? Here's a machine that'll do it for you, precisely measuring a 35-calorie portion at a time. Keep in mind, butter is 100% fat.

This could actually be useful. If you're a fanatic about calorie counting, dole out a controlled portion, count it accurately, slim down. While you're at it, don't forget to count those crows on the clothesline. – Charlie White

Product Page [whatever works, via ber review]

Scale Weighs You In With Celebs: Hope You're Not Mr. Ed

Charlie White — Tue, 29 Aug 2006 12:14:18 EDT

Weight is just a number, right? Not any more with the Celebrity Weighing Scale, eschewing numbers altogether and assigning you a celebrity that corresponds to your weight. Let's just hope you tip the scales closer to that of the Baby Jesus or Oliver Twist, rather than its higher end, comparing you to the likes of Mr. Ed or King Kong. You'll feel cool if you match up with Chuck Norris or Goldie Hawn.

Angry Associates also offers an icon-based scale, letting you weigh in to a corresponding chicken, goat, pig, or heaven forbid, a cow. Your choice, celebs or fauna for 35 (about ~~$60~~ $45). – Charlie White

Celebrity Weighing Scales [diet-blog]

Caffeine-Laced Pantyhose for Weight Loss

Charlie White — Fri, 19 May 2006 11:31:54 EDT

Now you can wear your coffee and drink it, too. Slim Fit 20 pantyhose have embedded caffeine microcapsules that are released by body heat, mainlining that java mojo right into your bloodstream and boosting your metabolism. That way, so the fantasy goes, you can burn fat right off those thunder thighs, using this effortless and miraculous method. The manufacturer of this product also claims that if you wear these tights every day you can lose around an inch from your thighs after just one-to-four weeks, and also get rid of cellulite and that horrific "orange peel" effect. Of course, caution the snake-oil salesmen, this may not work for everyone.

We're hoping this is just a joke, because this entire concept is based on a misunderstanding. You can't spot reduce, you can't stimulate metabolism in just one part your body (if you do lose weight your body will decide where it's coming from), and caffeine is not exactly a weight-loss drug. Heck, if caffeine were effective for weight loss, we would all be positively skeletal by now. And we're not. Available for non-skeptical Brits, Slim Fit 20 pantyhose are £27 for a pack of three.

Caffeine Tights [Coolest Gadgets]

Promise Lip Balm Claims to Curb Appetite

Charlie White — Fri, 17 Feb 2006 11:51:46 EST

For those who are forever searching for effective yet effortless ways to lose weight, Omega Tech Labs is now pushing Promise, an alleged appetite suppressant disguised as lip balm. A month s supply will cost you between four and five bucks, and claims to not only slow down that ravenous appetite but it's also supposed to freshen your breath at the same time. With this product, you might want be a little concerned about the word promise. When a marketer invokes that word, look out for the exact opposite. Caveat emptor.

Product page (via Strange New Products)